Missed It

The smell of his skin after a bath.  The softness of his hands as he slaps my face, batting my mouth and nose indiscriminately, completely unaware that he may be causing pain or annoyance.  The screeching for the heavens which makes that weird ringing noise between your ears, circling your brain and eliminating all thought.  The stiffening of his back and limbs when resisting my efforts to contain him, showing his independence already at such a young age.  I think to myself that the next few years will be rough, this child is already stubborn and strong willed.

How will I handle what is to come, the defiance combined with the strength and coordination to carry out his wants and desires?

How does one convince a wild animal to be tame?

Ruckus will be six months old in two days.  He sits on his own, chews on everything within reach, smiles, babbles, and eats cereals and fruits and vegetables with delight and a hearty appetite.  His first tooth made an appearance two weeks ago and he can't seem to leave it alone for more than an hour, chewing his hands and drooling like a faucet. 

I love him.  I love it all and miss him the minute I walk out the door, every single day.  My arms feel empty as I carry my purse in to work, and I am missing a sloppy kiss from a certain charmer right this minute.  I sit and wonder if he is sleeping right now, is he giggling at some silly thing the dog has done, is he rattling the glasses in the cabinet with his screams of delight?

I will dial the telephone and talk to his dad, my husband who has set his own life aside to care for our tiny man.  Soon he will pass the phone to our baby and I will chatter in his ear, asking him to be good for his dad, and I will tell him that I love him and miss him so much.  He will smile and mouth the phone until I am done and I will make it through this day.

Eight more hours and I will be home.  I will hold his hand and tell him about my day, tell him how much I missed him, kiss his cheek.  He will yank on my hair and slap my face and I will smile, and be happy.